From Victim to Victory

In 2010, I was diagnosed with an autoimmune disease called Guillain–Barré syndrome. It affects the central nervous system and causes paralyzation when triggered by stress, loud noises, falling, or any type of physical stress. I didn’t have a job, my dad died, and then I was diagnosed with this disease. 

After you’ve had a disease for five years, it becomes a part of your identity, how you live, and how you see yourself. When I found the Lord in 2014, I really felt like he needed me to be healthy. The Lord put it on my heart that I was seeing myself as this “sick person” and I was giving in to a victim mentality.

At the time, I couldn’t use the stairs, I had to be on flat ground; I couldn’t go on gravel because it could make me fall and go into another episode.

Then I started trusting in the Lord and living for Jesus. God showed me that the disease was not my identity. I knew He wanted me to let it go and give it to Him. He wanted me to be brave. I was on a lot of medication and God showed me that it was making me numb from the inside out. He put it on my heart that I needed to change things. So I did. 

Three weeks later, having gone completely off my medicine, I started to feel hungry again and I felt my body coming alive.

Since then I haven’t had a Guillain–Barré episode. It’s been 5 years since I got off the medicine. I listened to the Lord and did what he asked me to do. It was so scary. I thought, “Either I am going to die, or God is a good God, and he will do what He has said.”

He did what He said. 

He also asked me to give up the state accounting position that I had found. I saw YWAM Ships Kona needed an accountant on Craigslist and I knew that was where God wanted me. I was comfortable in my job but left it to serve at YWAM Ships Kona. God had asked me to do these other things first and I saw that he was trustworthy. He first helped me get better then invited me into doing his work. 

The YWAM Ships Kona base has a lot of staircases. I use them 5-6 times a day when before I wouldn’t even have been able to go up any stairs at all. I would have never taken this job if I hadn’t obeyed God and got off the medicine and seen the amazing miraculous improvements in my nervous system and seen my body come back to life. 

He led me to trust him. He healed me and then he directed me in my work. I have such a love for everyone at YWAM Ships Kona and for what we do here. I wouldn’t have the sense of purpose I have in my work today if I hadn’t been willing to follow God into the unknown. It was scary at first, but it has been so worth it.

Wendy Holden
Accounting
YWAM Ships Kona

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